Tears in the Night
by lia-finn
Summary: He knew that loving him had never been easy to her. But they couldn´t stay apart.


Title: Tears in the Night  
  
Author: Lia  
  
E-Mail Address: fairyland15@hotmail.com  
  
Rating: PG-13  
  
Classification: Angst, Romance Tim/Calleigh  
  
Spoilers: Some, starting from Dispo Day  
  
Summary: He knew that loving him had never been easy to her. But they couldn´t stay apart.  
  
Disclaimers: Not mine. Belongs to Jerry Bruckheimer and CBS. No infringement is intended. No money is being made with this. I just wish.  
  
Author´s Note: My very first CSI:Miami fic. Thank you Pat for beta. Feedback is much appreciated and wanted. And English is not my first language. Enjoy the story!  
  
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It started right after he had been shot. He wasn´t surprised when she appeared at his door late that night. Without a word she slipped past him inside and waited as he closed the door before turning to look at her. He looked exhausted, and she could detect a familiar scent of whiskey as she stepped closer, and she felt her heart aching for him.  
  
He stared at her in silence, and she met his eyes before leaning up to touch his lips with hers. His arms wrapped around her waist and he pulled her closer, and she let out a muffled moan as he deepened the kiss. His hands sneaked under her shirt, and he felt her shiver.  
  
They had made it into the bedroom, and it was then that he stopped. His eyes dark with desire, breath heavy with passion. He wanted her. But he was giving her a chance to change her mind. She pulled her shirt over her head, making her long hair fall down on her back, and to him, she had never looked so beautiful.  
  
The sheets felt cool against her heated skin. A small cry of pleasure leaving her lips broke the silence of the night and she begged for more. And he obeyed. Never she had felt such a passion as she did that night when he loved her. Never she had gave so much comfort to someone who needed it. And never he had admitted to himself he needed someone, needed her, as he did in the cover of the night.  
  
Hours later she lay in his arms, careful of the bruise on his chest caused by the bullet as it had impacted his kevlar vest.  
  
"I could have lost you today."  
  
He knew the words weren´t meant for him to hear. He knew she was crying. He lay still, silent, and let her cry.  
  
She was gone when he woke up in the morning.  
  
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It was raining. She stood by the window watching the strom raging outside, flinching every time the lightning split the darkening sky. She took a sip of her coffee, closing her eyes as the warm liquid run down in her throat. Another strike of lightning, another crash of thunder. She was tired.  
  
He couldn´t take his eyes off of her. The day was slowly turning to night, shifts changing, the ones ending their shifts hurrying homes to be with their loved ones. He stood by the door, hands tucked deep in his pockets, watching her silently as the nature raged outside. He was in no hurry.  
  
She could feel his presence. As she always had. He made her feel safe, needed, wanted. He was so different than other men she had dated, so different than her. The nights she spent in his arms were enough. The relationship would be too complicated. This was enough. It had to be.  
  
She turned around and gave him a soft smile. "Finished?" She asked whispering, as afraid someone else would hear her.  
  
He shook his head and hated himself for being a coward. But he was afraid. Afraid to have feelings for her. He needed her at night, god he wanted her more than he had ever wanted anyone. His silent answer to her simple question made her sigh sadly before turning to place the empty cup on the counter.  
  
"I´ll see you later." She said softly, making the words came out as a statement.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
And as she passed him, he closed his eyes as he felt her body brushing against his, and feelings he had so carefully hidden rushed into his mind and he felt betrayed, by his own body and mind.  
  
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The night after the night club fire was hot even the sun had set hours ago. He was sitting on his bike in front of the familiar apartment building, and for a moment he thought of leaving and never let her know he had came.  
  
She opened the door and pulled him inside without a word. Windows were open, curtains swaying slightly as the night breeze blew in. Candles were burning on the coffee table, flames flickering, creating dancing shadows on the wall. She walked to him, and he pulled her into his arms, needing to feel her close.  
  
For a long time they stayed like that before she pulled back and took his hand. It was quiet, the distant sounds of the never sleeping city barely reaching their ears as she led him into her bedroom. Slowly he undressed her, his dark eyes sad and serious as his met hers. She reached to unbutton his shirt and pushed it back from his shoulders, letting it fall on the floor.  
  
His soft lips moving from hers to her breasts, a hand running down to touch her where she ached the most, and he felt her shiver under him, and he wanted to give her more. He wanted to give her everything. She cried out his name as the waves of pleasure washed over her for the first time, and when he laid on her, breathing heavily against her neck, she let the silent tears fell. Silently he moved off of her and pulled her close. They fell asleep.  
  
And only just before the sunrise, after many more encounters, he left the bed, shivering slightly as the cool morning breeze wrapped around his naked body like a blanket. Silently he dressed and reached to brush a lock of golden hair away from her face before disappearing into the dawn.  
  
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He wanted to tell her he had been worried. That if it would have been his choice, he had taken her off the case. He wanted to tell her that he felt more protective over her now.  
  
The car turned to the parking lot and he tucked his hands deeper in his pockets. From the behind his sunglasses he watched as she stepped out of the car and laughed softly at something John Hagen had said. She saw him waiting for her and the smile on her lips disappeared.  
  
"I´ll be right there." She said to the detective and with a nod he disappeared into the air conditioned building.  
  
He wanted to tell her. But the words died on his lips, and he turned his eyes away. He had no right to feel that protective, or that jealous.  
  
She stood close to him, and he could feel her almost touching. Her hair turned to gold in the sun, and he fought back the urge to reach and brush back the lock of hair. Losing the battle he pushed the escaped lock back and let his hand linger against the soft skin of her cheek before pulling away.  
  
"I´m fine." She answered softly to his unasked question.  
  
"I could have killed him." He said quietly.  
  
She let out a soft breath, his closeness calming her. At that moment she wanted nothing but to feel his strong arms around her, holding her close. Hank Kerner would haunt her for a long time.  
  
"I should go." She looked past him. Tears were burning in her eyes, but she couldn´t cry in front of him.  
  
He nodded silently.  
  
She made no move to leave. She felt like losing it, right there in front of the building she worked everyday. Right there in the middle of the day in front of the man she wanted but could not have.  
  
"God." She whispered and covered her face with her hand, embarrassed, tired and angry.  
  
"Come here." He reached to pull her into his arms, and her arms wrapped around his waist, her face buried against his chest. Silently he held her as she cried heart breaking until she had no more tears left.  
  
She was exhausted, the events of the day finally taking over. He rested his cheek against her head, his hand caressing her back, and she felt safe. The minutes that passed felt like hours to her as she finally pulled away from his embrace. Her eyes were red, her cheeks stained with tears.  
  
"I´ll take you home." He said quietly and took her hand.  
  
Without a word she nodded and followed her to the car.  
  
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"I´m in love with you."  
  
Her confession didn´t come as a surprise to him. But he couldn´t turn and face her. The night was falling and light rain drops hit the windows as the missed rain wiped over the city.  
  
She bit her lips as she waited for his reaction, refusing to regret saying the words.  
  
"You shouldn´t." He said finally, still facing the window, but eyes closed. He had no courage to look at her.  
  
The breath she had been holding came out as a quiet sob and she felt the familiar ache in her heart. Her eyes fell closed, and she fought against the tears and this time she won easily. She felt him moving and opened her eyes. He stood in front of her, and she wanted to reach to touch him. She wanted to ask him to explain, and ask why he didn´t feel the same. But she didn´t move, and she stayed in silence.  
  
He lifted his hand to touch her face, but she turned her head away. Sighing he lowered his hand. It was harder than he thought. His feelings for her were too strong to ignore, so he pushed them back deep inside. She deserved  
  
more than him. And he wanted her to have it.  
  
"But I want you." Only her words made him realize he had spoken out loud and he shook his head.  
  
She backed away from him, her heart breaking with every step, the walls around her heart he had once broken down were up again, this time more thick and more high.  
  
"I do love you Tim. I always will." She whispered.  
  
"I know." He said softly. And again he hated himself for being a coward.  
  
She left him in the dark break room, and as the minutes passed, the night shift was slowly walking in and moving around to get a cup of coffee, talking and laughing. He tucked his hands in his pockets and looked around. And finally he understand what the pain in his chest meant; that his heart was broken. He had lost the one he loved the most. And he had lost her because he was afraid.  
  
The End 


End file.
